Holy Crap

Can the camera show Garnett for 5 seconds without him saying "Motherfucker?" Is it possible?

As much as Keggers claims that these games are going to give him a heart attack, I think I was actually having some legit palpatations while watching Game 6 yesterday. I would normally attribute this to an unusual combination of food and beer, but today is special. Today, boys and girls, is just another day on the road to Game 7, and last night's game was batshit crazy.

#1. Did anyone actually expect Rondo to get tossed? I know basketball is a game for fucking pussies, but tossing a guy into the boards is a flagrant - nothing more. That said, I LOVED seeing Aaron Gray come out of nowhere to pseuco-protect scrappy lil' Hinrich from big bad Rondo after the initial scuffle - it's like some lightswitch clicked on in his skull. "AARON PROTECT KIRK FRIEND! BABY RUTH!!!"

Skip ahead to the :25 mark to see the moment in question (and skip some painful Celtics footage). Also, did you know that it is impossible to get a non-custom Aaron Gray jersey? I seriously spent an hour looking yesterday before gametime.

#2. Rondo is racist. First Miller, and then Hinrich? What do you have against the white man, Rondo?

#3. We need to bash Ray Allen's kneecaps. Look, we tried doing this the honorable way - we tried every defense VDN knows (so...two), and we even resorted to (gasp) doubleteaming Allen at one point. He still dropped 51 on us yesterday, including yet another "Oh My Fucking Lord Just Kill Me Now" three-pointer to send us into yet another OT. I just can't keep thinking that we're going to win with less than 10 seconds remaining only to have Allen or Pierce make me want to kill myself. Seriously - name your price.

#4. Brad Miller doesn't need a working face to play. Say what you will about how ugly Miller's face was after getting Rondo'd earlier this week, but Miller doesn't need a working face to get the job done. 22 points doesn't seem like a whole lot in 3 OT, but when you realize Miller was 5-5 from the line, 2-2 for three, and 8-9 shooting anything else, there wouldn't have been anyone else you wanted to touch the ball with the game on the line. And, with Miller's game winning FT, it worked out just like that.

#5. Joakim Noah is OK with me. After that monster block on Pierce followed by the big dunk (and a foul!), I just can't stay mad at his gaffes. Sure, his methods are unconventional, but you can't argue that he is a giant bundle of energy just waiting to erupt at every chance. Also, the fact that he looks like a crack whore every time he opens his mouth is an extra bonus.

GIMME SOME GODDAMNED SMACK!

I seriously cannot wait for Saturday night's game. The Bulls are playing with everything they've got (including VDN's shitty gameplan), and it's still tight against a depleted Celtics team. Still, one of the most insane series' ever, with a gametime to OT ratio of 2:1. Sick.

HLHPSTSMBS Needs Our Help

The girthily titled Cavs blog Hey Larry Hughes, Please Stop Taking So Many Bad Shots needs our help. You see, their namesake recently got shipped off to our corner of the internets and they is asking their readers (if you are not included in that group, you should be) for some help in figuring out what the next step is.

My vote is to change the name:

Chicago: Where Larry Hughes Happens.

The Bulls Are Terrible

"No more P.F. Chang's after 7 PM!"

Can the Bulls do ANYTHING right?

We get a matchup against the Knicks, a team so bad that they have a 1-13 record on the road (plus we get to play them at home), and what do we do? We stink up the place!

Jim Boylan led our deuce-a-bulls into the 4th with a tight game (how is that even possible), and the Bulls were up 15. You'd think that the Bulls would lock it down, and put up another solid 20-something points in the 4th to finish it. Instead, we get outscored 12-27 in the 4th quarter (and this is the KNICKS we're talking about here), and lose 105-100. We didn't score more than two points in the last five minutes, letting the Knicks stack up a free 16 points on us.

Eddy Curry ripped us a new asshole (right next to the one he gave us when he left), and while Smith and Wallace had double-digit REB's, they were all AFTER they let the offense shoot. I don't care how many rebounds you get if you can't stop your man from shooting in the first place.

With a season likely in the toilet (we always rebound, but I don't think we're going to come nearly as close this year without Skiles), I think it's about time we used our secret weapon off the bench:

"Mad hops."