The Real Reason Anyone Cares About Bartolo Colon

He's old, he's fat, he's injury prone, and he has little to nothing in the way of loyalty to a team. Why do we care about him and why do we always try to get him on the team? Good god man, think of the headlines!

Colon battered by Yankees

Overworked Colon triumphs

Bradley beats Colon

Colon experiencing tightness

Trouble ahead for Colon

Colon recovering nicely

Colon looms large

Extra effort pays off for Colon

Colon brings the heat

"I"m having trouble locating," says Colon

Colon comes through in a pinch

Postseason push for Colon

Colon scratched

Colon suffering from soreness

Colon rebounds nicely

Colon feels shitty

Poop.