The Most Important News. Ever.

"Who's the meanest? Mothafuckin' Sho-nuff!"

This is old news to some of you, but for those of you that haven't been on top of your game, I bring you the most important news. Ever.

Samuel L Jackson will be playing Sho-Nuff in the NZA remake of Berry Gordy's The Last Dragon. For most of you, this news means nothing. To most of you, I say fuck you. The Last Dragon is quite possibly one of the best movies ever. EVER. Not only does it feature some of the best blacksploitation (Ed's note: No comment from spellcheck on that one...) comedy ever, but it has a guy named "Bruce Leroy." How do you go wrong with that?!

Now, let's be honest - for the few people that not only read this blog (making them a minority already) but also know/care about The Last Dragon (microscopic minority), you already knew this. In fact, you knew this a while ago, tried to tell your friends/significant other, and had them give you a quizzical "Do you mean that Bruce Lee movie?" look before walking away. You had no outlet to talk. None. Here at the Dong, we understand.

I'm so stoked, that I can't stop myself from imagining the possibilities. I mean, just look at these!

"Leeeroooy! Who - is - the master?"

"I am."

"Playtime's over, boy!"

Wow. I just shit my pants from excitement and my shit just got goosebumps. That's how unreasonably pumped I am about this movie.

Anyone else going to get in line now for the premier?

Nothing Happened

I fucking love Chunky soup!

Uh, nothing really happened yesterday. At all. The Bulls, Bears and Blackhawks all had the day off, and there really wasn't anything in terms of baseball news or rumors, unless you count the possible pursuit of Joey Gathright...and I don't.

Hell, I can't even make the "Donovan McNabb might show up in Chicago next year" throwaway post because, well, it's not gonna happen. McNabb is probably run out of Philly, but why would the Bears overpay for someone who's not getting the job done - especially when we have the cheap and effective Neckbeard?

Here's hoping one week from tonight has The Beard with a huge game against the Pack, and a crushing loss for the Vikings.

Go Bears.

'Tis The Season

Baseball is almost upon us, folks, and with it comes the majesty that is fantasy baseball. Let me explain, using the proverbial '1,000 words', my history with fantasy baseball.



I can't believe I'm doing this again. Go Cubs!