Even at half speed, I will defeat you.
Derrick Rose cake-walked through the All-Star weekend skills challenge, making Devin Harris, Tony Parker and Mo Williams look slow as he jogged through the motions and took home the trophy in 33.3 seconds (besting Harris by a full 3+ seconds). He also finished it off with a nasty reverse dunk that would have earned high marks in the (relatively weak) dunk contest.
In other news, Derrick Rose is the most nonchalant, disinterested and aloof human being I've ever seen. Saying he's "shy" may just be a nice way of saying the dude really doesn't give a shit.
In other other news, A-Rod was busted for taking an illegal plutonium-enhanced tanning supplement:
What a fucking douche.