Hey Wait a Second

Please David...be my angel of mercy...

As much as people give the Cubs shit about being cursed, they didn't stick out so much until both the Red and White Sox broke their lasting slumps with World Series wins. The White Sox did it with ridiculous pitching and timely hitting, and the Red Sox did it on Schilling's fucked up ankle and a shitload of power bats.

The 2003 Red Sox had huge power hitters that crushed the opposition - guys like Jason Varitek, Trot Nixon and David Ortiz posted career highs in homeruns...

...hey, wait a second.

Aren't we in the midst of a "tainted piss from seven years ago" problem in baseball? Going with that stream of consciousness, that means the first story out of 2010 will be the 2003 cheaters...and I don't think the Boston faithful are going to like it.

Oh, you doubt me? Let's look at the tale of the tape!

Jeremi Giambi: Psh. He not only has already been busted for using 'roids, but has big brother Jason to help out in the land of doping.

Gabe Kapler: Kapler is also a known doper - two for two now. Hahaha, you guys are fucked.

Jason Varitek: Varitek cranked 25 homers, his highest in a single season. Varitek has actually been hitting in the 18-22 HR range for his career, so this one doesn't stick out as much as...

Bill Mueller: Mueller not only hit a career-high 19 HR (for a guy who averages 10 a year, that's a bit much), but he also upped his batting average by 40 points to hit .326 on the year. He never came close to either number again.

Trot Nixon: Experienced mysterious surge of power from 2001-2003, hitting 28 HR in 2003 (the most he put up in any year after that was 13 HR). Oh, and did I mention that his batting averge jumped 20 points as well to a career-high .306 (pretty impressive for a career .270 hitter).

David Ortiz: Here's the biggest name on the list. Ortiz played with Minnesota for years, hitting 20 HR in 2002 (his career best). Enter 2003, Ortiz becomes an all-powerful beast mode slugging machine. Ortiz cranked 31 in 2003, then 41, 47, and 54 in 04, 05 and 06, respectively. Since then (and likely since a hardcore steroid crackdown began), Ortiz's number dropped off dramatically, hitting 35 HR in 2007 and a paltry 23 HR in 2008.

Without going too deep into the numbers, you've already got three guys who put up career highs in HR, two known dopers, and one guy whose HR numbers briefly hit the stratosphere. If these signs don't point to 'roids, I don't know what does. I wonder if they undo championships...

Hey, how about those other 103 names on the 2003 list, eh?