Back to the (wrong) Basics

As written by the author of "S is for Steriods" and "U is for Moises Alou's Urine"

After four games without a homer, the Sox decided that maybe - JUST MAYBE - finishing in the top 5 for homeruns hit over the last decade may have had something to do with winning (longest drought since...April 2005?). Case in point, the Sox hit three homers last night, and managed to win (Cubs hit two last night, and also pulled out a win...but who wants to talk about those guys anyways?).

First of all, what the hell is the deal with the Sox and ex-Royals pitchers? In the last three years, I can think of at least SIX ex-Royals relievers on our team (Sisco, MacDougal, Dotel, Carrasco, Hanley Ramirez, and most recently, Jimmy Gobble). Seriously - what is Ozzie's obsession with picking up Kansas City's crap!? With Richard and Carrasco both pitching a chunk of innings, it looks like the next 5th starter will be Lance Broadway (full rest) - otherwise Ozzie is going to be using two players to get through five innings again next week.

Second, can we talk about this "brilliant" lineup Guillen trotted out? If I haven't stated this before, Brent Lillibridge should not be starting. Ever. I don't care if there's a nuclear holocaust and all of the players are dead - Lillibridge sits his ass on the bench until a pinch-runner is needed. Instead, Ozzie decided to trot out Podsednik AND Lillibridge in the worst defensive outfield I have seen in a long time (since...last week).

Why do you mock me, Ozzie? Why do you refuse to start Alexei Ramirez in CF (where he is probably our best defensive option), but instead bench him to start Nix instead? Why not let Getz play the outfield too? As is my understanding you have six guys to play three infield spots tolerably (Nix, Getz, Ramirez, Betemit, Fields, Lillibridge), meaning that you can play the hot hand (Fields, Nix, and Getz) and put the remaining players (like Ramirez) in the outfield if they are qualified to play there. Don't just play the hot hand and then bench a talented defensive player who needs more at bats to get his swing back on track.

If things don't clear up for this team, I'm looking to deal the vets at the All Star Break: Dye, Thome, and Colon get dealt to bring in young pitchers and a legit outfield prospect (imagine having Jeremy Reed or Ryan Sweeney back...that'd be nice right about now). Who's with me?