Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Guess Who Won't Be Buying the Cubs?

Cubs or hookers...Cubs or hookers...

Mark Cuban, accused of insider trading (with Mamma.com of all websites! How could you!?), will likely not be buying the Cubs any time soon. Aside from the $750,000 that he likely saved by selling off all of his stock early, he likely will have to pay many millions in the resulting civil suit. For a man with a net worth of $2 billion, that's a rather sizeable chunk of change. However hilarious that this may be (and I especially love Cuban's blog post), I don't give a rat's ass about Mark Cuban's finances.

What I do care about is if Cuban is still going to be a front-runner to purchase the Cubs. As of this precise second, I have two quick reasons that say "NO."

#1. Moneeeeeeh. Aside from all the money Cuban is going to lose for "damages," the economy is in the shitter as well. This is HARDLY a buyer's market, and Sam Zell wants to get every penny...including the ones that they threw at Kosuke Fukudome to warm the bench.

#2. Selig. Bud Selig spent the last few years trying to wipe away the shitstain on baseball that is steroids. After some careful work (investigations, upped steroid rules, blackballed Barry Bonds), the mess is "mostly" behind us. Still, that was a lot of work just because one thing slipped through the cracks. I really don't think Selig is in a hurry to bring in an owner with the possibility of illegal activity - and he does have the power to vote against him as an owner.

Cuban would really have been a good fit for the Cubs - deep pockets, cares about winning, and is a "man of the people." Hell, I'll bet he would have even found a way to force Nowitzki to play in right field. Not only would he have been a face on a franchise that has long been "faceless," but he would probably have given Chicago fans the vitriol we secretly crave.

Alas. He coulda been a contendah.

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