Monday, June 1, 2009

Worshipping Brian Anderson

After yesterday's White Sox win, it's time to start looking for an explanation. You know what I mean - the inexplicable "winning" thing that seem to have taken off around, oh, May 19th (incidentally, the day Brian Anderson was activated from the DL...). Okay, we've been over this before, but it needs to be said again: the White Sox are winning because of Brian Anderson. I don't really know how else to explain it - as much as Ozzie wants to keep Anderson in the doghouse (oh, and if you were wondering why Lance Broadway was traded last week, look no further than Ozzie), it cannot be denied that he is our lord and savior.

Just look at these stats from May:

Games Played: 28
Games Played Without Brian Anderson: 16
Games Played With Brian Anderson: 12
Record in Games Without Brian Anderson: 4-12
Record in Games With Brian Anderson: 9-3

That's just all sorts of batshit crazy. Sure, Anderson is actually sort of productive at the moment (hitting .275), and is lightyears better than having Lillibridge start on the roster, but let's be honest here - he's Brian Anderson. He's not going to keep this up (as much as I want him to).

Yesterday's game was a prime example.

The Sox were up against the best pitcher in the AL (Zach Greinke), and were trailing until a mini-rally in the 5th. DeWayne Wise, in his first game back from the DL, did absolutely nothing. The score remained tied until the 9th, when Ozzie finally relented to reason and decided to bring in his best player:

Goddamnit! OK, Fine! I guess I have to put in that douchebag Anderson...

And hey, guess what? Anderson draws a walk in his only at-bat, scores, and facilitates a 3-run 9th inning that blows the game open. Jenks comes on, White Sox win, and Anderson saves the day yet again.

Anyone else a believer in the Cult of Brian Anderson?


Sox Machine said...

He's piggy-backing on the Podsednik Paradox.

McDoofus said...

Well now this is getting ridiculous. Last night he pinch hits for Wise and in the next inning Thome unties the game with a three-run homer.

Gepetto said...

You know it to be true