Thursday, June 11, 2009

Twitter (my balls)

(my balls)


In our glorious crusade aimed at spreading the good word and gospel of The Dong to the masses, we have reached an astounding 1,800 followers on the intertubes Twitter machine .

Obviously, LuolsDong is a an equal opportunity follower and will return the favor to anyone cool enough to follow us in the first place.

Apparently, the evil Twitter gods are attempting to thwart our rise to upper echelon of twitterdom by capping our ability to follow people at 2,000. For those of you who don't use twitter, this is the equivalent of trying to make friends in a pickup game of basketball without being allowed to talk to more than 3 of the 10 guys on the court. You'll probably pick 3 guys on your own team that you kinda know already, and you might end up with 3 better buddies but you'll definitely get 7 guys that think you're an asshole.

In twitter talk, we now have people following the Dong and we are not allowed to follow them back. It's an ugly faux paus (like clicking "I don't know this person" in LinkedIn or de-friending people on Facebook).

Reminds me of an old buddy from overseas:




Too harsh? Absolutely not.

NOBODY GIVES FUCKING ORDERS TO THE DONG.

Nobody can tell us who we can and cannot be friends with. This is a free fucking country. If people want to follow the Dong like an erect landmark, guiding them to great Chicago sports coverage and witty anecdotes, then they should at least be allowed to receive our return follow, like feeling the presence of the lord, and be given the honor to bask in our greatness.

I understand that twitter may be trying to curb aggressive marketing tactics, but 1800 of our 2000 follows are people that are already following us!


So here's to you Twitter, you communist nazi bastard. You can try to rubber the dong but our girth cannot be contained.


-KEG

**Update: Picture of Hitler was removed due to angry bubbie.

2 comments:

The TPC said...

WHAT!@$#$#@


This aggression will not stand. . .
This will not stand.
I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand, Dude. Across this line you do not fuck with the Dong.

Gepetto said...

Ha!