How the hell did this steroid abusing animal dodge the Mitchell Report???!!
Not only that, but somehow Sammy has never been clearly implicated in any drug test, clinic visit or BALCO connection. Canseco didn’t even mention Sosa in his book, “Juiced.” The most surprising thing about the Mitchell Report was not anyone on the list but the fact that Sosa escaped mention.
Does anyone really think this guy is clean? Even diehard Cubs fans admit he probably juiced during his 60 HR season in Chicago. He’s dumb enough to get busted for corking his bat, how did he manage to elude Federal investigation??
My theory:
Not only that, but somehow Sammy has never been clearly implicated in any drug test, clinic visit or BALCO connection. Canseco didn’t even mention Sosa in his book, “Juiced.” The most surprising thing about the Mitchell Report was not anyone on the list but the fact that Sosa escaped mention.
Does anyone really think this guy is clean? Even diehard Cubs fans admit he probably juiced during his 60 HR season in Chicago. He’s dumb enough to get busted for corking his bat, how did he manage to elude Federal investigation??
My theory:
Flintstones vitamins.
These things are fucking NUCLEAR man. Have you ever tried one? They’re absolutely delicious. There is no way these tiny nuggets of goodness contain the ridiculous quantity of vitamins A, C, E, B etc. Impossible. Not to mention the crazy neon color it turns my piss… like traffic-light yellow. It’s awesome.
Either there is some magical property in these “vitamins” that make the roids undetectable or… the vitamins provide him with super human strength. You decide.
These things are fucking NUCLEAR man. Have you ever tried one? They’re absolutely delicious. There is no way these tiny nuggets of goodness contain the ridiculous quantity of vitamins A, C, E, B etc. Impossible. Not to mention the crazy neon color it turns my piss… like traffic-light yellow. It’s awesome.
Either there is some magical property in these “vitamins” that make the roids undetectable or… the vitamins provide him with super human strength. You decide.
P.S. I know you fuckers are going to rip on my PC Paintbrush skills so in advance, you can all go suck a dick.
9 comments:
That is really the best "photoshop" I have ever seen
eggs great sosa pic, it looks a little like you junior year, coincidence I think not. The reason why sosa was not mentioned is because baseball has been berry berry good to him and he would never disgrace baseball by taking steroids.
That painbrush job is sweet. Were you able to upload it using Prodigy? Huh? 110 baud? Hm?
Like I said... go suck a dick.
(My old username on Prodigy: NVXF73D. That was before you got to CHOOSE a username, motherfucker. Snap.)
NVXF73E here -- and we all know Sosa didn't get busted because he doesn't speak English.
Case closed.
I remember I told a girl on Prodigy once that I died (pretending to be my parents)so that I wouldn't have to talk to her anymore.
Wouldn't it have been easier to just ignore her? You're sick. Traumatizing a little girl like that...
remember when Sosa was on the Sox and Hawk used to say, "That Sammy Sosa is so exciting."
Nope.
Burned all Sosa/chisox memories out of my brain.
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