Thursday, January 31, 2008

Chicago Superfriends

Meanwhile, back at the Halas Hall of Justice...

In an unprecedented move, the best and brightest of Chicago Sports have been recruited onto a special task force team to protect Earth in the name of truth, justice, and the American way.

[Carl Everett and Michael Barrett sit at a table playing a game of Connect 4]

Everett: Gotcha! Diagonally!

Barrett: I hate this damn game.

Everett: Well, it's not like there's much else to do around here. Ever since Ditka became mayor, the crime rate is as non-existant as dinosaurs.

[Loud buzzing noise, followed by flashing lights]

Aaron Gray: BABY RUTH!!!!

Barrett: AUGH!

AJ: Augh! What the hell!

Barrett: You started it!

Everett: This looks big -- everyone to the main room!

[Regroup at the main console]

Rodman: Everyone, this is big -- there's been an attack on the city! Our longtime nemesis ESPN has unleashed unstoppable news coverage of the Patriots/Giants game! They are slowly draining the brains of all Americans!

Everett: This is serious! What can we do?


Rodman: Not now, Alonzo -- save your strength for the battle ahead. I figure I'll take my invisible bike to do some recon, and then we can try for an all-out assault.

Everett: Yeah, no one will suspect the fag in a dress.

Barrett: That's not politically correct!

[Slugs AJ]

AJ: Seriously, man! What the fuck?!

Gray: BABY RUTH!!!

Rodman: You heard him, boys! Chicago Superfriends, AWAY!

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