Miscreants of Chicago Sports, 1st edition: Ronnie Woo Woo

Normally, if you enter a neighborhood where you see a guy urinating on walls, coked out of his mind and muttering things unintelligibly, you'd probably run the fuck away. What do Cubs fans do? Embrace him, of course.

This guy is funny the first time you see him at Wrigley. "Oh, isn't that cute, honey - a hobo making noise!" So you give him a dollar to go away. And then another one. And then the unmistakable smell of urine, feces and vomit overwhelm you to the point when you just give him everything you have...and that's Ronnie Woo Woo. I don't have an exact length of time that this homeless icon has been a part of Chicago Cubs lore, but he's definitely been there since I've been born.

Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers (Not to be confused with Bub Rubb and Lil Sis) is everything that's wrong with the Cubs. Loveable (for a small amount of time), loser, and...um...coke addict that smells like piss? Okay, okay, so I guess I went too far on that one. Unless the Cubs re-sign Moises Alou again.